I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
sex in a hospital.. check
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
