you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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