therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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