Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Randomize
