theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
