its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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