Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
