Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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