she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
