The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
