No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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