Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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