I didn't shave. On purpose
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
