Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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