Where are you?
In a non slutty way
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
