is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
