i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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