so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
