I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
The Olympian is in my bed
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
