escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
