Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
