so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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