Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
