i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
