Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
