He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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