He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
