I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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