scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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