I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
