i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
