awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
