yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
