haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize