Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
