Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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