Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
