i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
