No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
