Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize