im drinking this country out of the recession.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
