Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
