he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
