Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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