He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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