You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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