we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
