is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize