She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
