Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Randomize
